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Digital Pessimism Apocalipsis

Fifth trumpet broadcasted by Facebook Live

Vatican spokesman Greg Burke said this afternoon that the Vatican has reached an agreement with the US company Facebook for the Fifth Trumpet of the Apocalypse to be broadcasted on Facebook Live.

For more than two hours, they have defined the format and social options with which the planet can see and share the arrival of the announced army of scorpions, and how they will sting mercilessly to all who do not have in their front the mark Of the seal of God.

In addition, during the second month, a strictly direct interview will be broadcast between Pope Francis and the Angel of the Abyss, chief of the scorpions, called Abaddon. The fifth trumpet will have an extermination duration of 5 months, as documented in the Bible, but it is not known when it will begin, although according to how the world is going, it should not be missing much.

Social event

Facebook will develop a new <Like> button with which to vote the most bloodthirsty scorpion. The winning scorpion will be named president of the Episcopal Conference in Spain for as long as there is still life on the planet.

Apocalipsis trumpet

You can chat with the scorpions through the Messenger of the social network, give them advice or inform them of the geolocation of the sinners.

In the case of atheists, the Messenger will give the option to send the scorpions a thumb with the finger down next to the name of the atheist, which will act as a direct death sentence.

Each user of the social network will have an accountant who will accumulate the effective death sentences that he has sent. The winner will be named pope at the death of the present, in the case that by then there is still life on the planet.

In case Satan decides to appear, Facebook will prepare a special party device that will be announced by push notifications to all Smartphones that have installed the social network App.


Here we reproduce the most important reactions in social networks:

@perezreverte : Finally someone decides to solve problems with balls. I want to join ya, you bitch!

@scorpionsband>  We do not know very well what to think about this …

@ malquias43: Who is now the fucking master?

@millenialboy: # How #cheers! #When does it start #? #trumpet #tour #papa #corpions

@larubiadeallado: How many trumpets are there? #sunsetliving #love #selfiewithme #happiness

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